Home, not so sweet, home

It hit me like a brick the day my Husband left me and our two little boys. Six years of marriage just thrown away in a second.
The first I knew of it, was when he came down stairs with his suitcases saying " if I stay, I'll end up cheating on you ".Words I'll NEVER forget.
Our oldest Son looked up at me as if to ask "where's Daddy going ?"
He was so confused by it all, only being five years old at the time. I felt so helpless, all I could do was to cry and hold him close to me to comfort him. Our youngest Son was only a year old and hadn't a clue what was going on.
After a few weeks, I decided to move home to Sheffield to be nearer to my family. The thought of bringing two young boys up on my own, filled me with apprehension and dread.
My family were a great comfort to me and I felt comfort to know that they were all there for me.
I ate at my Mums house and slept on my Sister's attic floor and felt a burden to them all.
After only a few weeks, I found a house to rent privately and couldn't wait to move in. I thought it quicker than waiting for a Council property.
We would have our own space again and could start a new life.
The Landlord knew I was keen to move in straight away and said that if I didn't mind him calling round to finish repairs, I could move in straight away.
I had no furniture at all and I slept on milk crates in the living room, whilst the boys slept on a single mattress someone had given me until my furniture arrived from the Social. Very menial but very much appreciated.
I started my eldest in his new school and finally the furniture arrived.
Thank goodness I'd bought my eldest boy a portable TV the Christmas before, at least we had something to watch.
All went very well for a few weeks after we moved in. I even started seeing someone I had met a few years before, not realising he lived in that area with his Mum.
Now, when you first move into a new house, the Social pay your first month's rent but then it's quite a while before they send you any more until it's all been sorted out. I waited weeks. The Landlord kept on asking me where the rent was and I kept on phoning the Social to ask them where it was. All they kept saying was that it takes time and that the Landlord was very welcome to call them and they would explain it to him .
After a while, the Landlord did calm down about the rent and we went about our business as usual.
One afternoon after collecting my eldest from school, my Landlord came round to finish some repairs on the kitchen cupboards. I offered him a cup of tea and went into the kitchen to put the kettle on, unaware that he was right behind me.
As I reached over to grab the kettle, he put his arms tight around me and said that he would get his rent by other means .
He held my arms to my side and picked me up . At just over seven stones in weight, I wasn't too heavy to carry . He started to carry me upstairs and all I remember is my youngest Son screaming by the side of me " Mummy, Mummy " I tried to kick my way free but I was kicking my youngest Son in the face, so I had to stop.
I knew I had to make it all look like a game, for my boys sake, so I pulled the candlewick bedspread over us. The inevitable happened and all I remember is seeing my eldest Son hiding in a cupboard in the wall to the side of us.
The welfare of my boys was paramount to me and I HAD to keep calm. All I remember is my Landlord saying to me afterwards was " We're still mates aren't we ?"
I called next door and asked if I could use his phone to call my Mum. She wouldn't let me tell my Dad about it, as she was afraid of what he and my Brothers would do and they'd probably get themselves arrested .. I had no one but myself to get through this.I went over to my boyfriend's Mums house and his Brother answered the door. He called the Police and they questioned me AND my oldest Son . They said even though he was only seven, he was my only witness and they would like him to testify in court. I agreed.
My Landlord's Mother lived across the road from me and came banging on the front door, all guns a blazing, to have a go at me the next morning . She was furious, as any Mother would be if their Son was accused of rape I suppose.
The Police came and told me I HAD to move out immediately for my own safety.
We were sent to a safe house in Doncaster,leaving ALL our belongings behind, where we lived for seven months , until I got a Council house in a place called hell ...